We’ve all heard it, felt it, sensed it, experienced it and dealt with it in some way or another, it’s FEAR! You know … False Evidence Appearing Real!! The question is, how are you going to handle it now and forever?
Getting out of your comfort zone for most is challenging, to say the least. It’s been my experience that the missing element is psychological. Too many times I’ve said to myself, “I don’t know HOW to do this” and self sabotaged my brain into believing I could not do it. What I’ve come to know is this; it’s not the “how” that is so important but rather the “why” behind it! Get a big enough WHY and the HOW will follow!
It’s the old 80/20 rule … 80% is psychology and the remaining 20% is the mechanics. We all tend to get what we HAVE to have. It boils down to what YOU believe YOU MUST do and chose to not settle for anything less!! Turning your “should’s” into “must’s” and making the decision to move forward in spite of the fear.
Feel the fear and do it anyway! If you truly want to get the edge, you will need to get over your fear. Fear of failure, fear of embarrassment, fear of whatever … it’s okay to make a mistake, just make sure you learn from it and avoid the same pit falls next time around.
Choose to live life on your own terms. The quality of life is the quality of your emotions on a daily basis. Control your emotions and take control of your destiny! Consider this, it’s not how long I live but rather, how I live! It’s not about your ability; it’s about why you must succeed!!
Two things to help you control your emotions, deal with your BODY and what you FOCUS on at any given moment.
1 – Body, the psychology that we are “in” is driven by the physiology that we are “in”. Specifically, when we change our MOTION we change our EMOTION and therefore experience a change of “state”. It’s these “states” (or emotions), that will determine our action towards any given target.
2 – Focus, what you focus on and moreover, “how” you focus, plays a vital roll in your achievements (or lack thereof). We must remember, what’s wrong is always available to us but so is, what’s right! Understand that “problems” are a sign of life. Want to see someone who doesn’t have any more problems? Drop by your nearest cemetery, they’re done! No more problems … and no more life!! Direct your focus, whatever you focus on you moves you towards that object or experience. There isn’t a “try” … only do or not do!
I’ve noticed several things about myself that I can’t help but believe others must share in similar experiences or situations. The difference for me now, is how I choose to “control” or “focus” myself as situations arise. This is a broad range of things from attending a party and “experiencing” my emotions, to simply taking a shower and getting ready for the day. It’s truly how I manage my “state” during the situation that defines my experience!
To be more clear, it’s what I choose to focus on while showering or while at the party. If while showering I’m having thoughts of … oh no, it’s Monday again, I hate the first day of each workweek! I hate Monday’s!! I wish I could just stay home and sleep in. I have to fight the stinking traffic everyday. I wish I had another car, a bigger more fancy car.
On and on it goes and before you finish your morning shower … presto, you’re in a bad mood and ready to bite your partners head off! You’re having emotions of agitation and experiencing anxiety about going to work, all before you even get dressed to go.
I suggest and submit to you it all begins with your THOUGHTS. It’s these thoughts that begin to effect our emotions (or states) and once we LEARN how to control them, we then have a much more powerful position that will determine our actions.
Use MOTION to create EMOTION and control your results. Back to the shower scene … sing, shout, clap your hands, pretend the soap bottle (or bar) is your microphone, move briskly, breath deeply and think about good things. (Remember, you get to choose what you think about … it’s your personal power)! Wouldn’t you rather get dressed feeling good about the day ahead of you, as opposed to dreading the very next moment? Sure you would, and you get to pick your experience. It may take some practice or “conditioning” on your part but it will become a “habit” once you focus on training your brain and body to do so.
You can control your fear and use it as leverage to compel you towards your goals. It the courage behind the fear that builds the faith within us that makes us stronger. Esteem comes from forcing yourself to do difficult things. Therefore, causing us to broaden our comfort zones while strengthening our faith.
Can you see faith? I submit to you, we are able to see the evidence of faith. No one has ever seen the wind but it evidence is everywhere to be seen. Faith unused wanes!