Not enough time, boss pushing for work to be completed, children are annoying you, bills to pay, shopping to be done, housework to do, partner asking for your help…
Does this seem like a familiar scenario in your life? Stress is always with us controlling what we do and how we feel. If you’re stressed you do things faster and in an unhappier way. You either become aggressive towards other people as a form of releasing the stress or you become submissive by hiding the stress.
By being submissive and hiding your stress, it internally eats at you hurting your emotions and your relationships. By being aggressive towards another person, you temporarily feel relief, but then reality kicks in as you feel more stressed from hurting the other person.
You need to learn ways to manage your stress and not let it get the better of you and the people around you. Stress motivates us to take action but it too often works against us. I’ve come up with the best ways and techniques to manage stress:
1) Leave others alone – If the other person is not involved, leave them alone. It is so tempting to release your stress on other people. Do not treat people inappropriately. By treating them the way they do not want to be treated, you build up their stress which they will be happy to put back on you. If someone is causing stress, you need to address the person explaining to them how you feel, why you feel that way, and what can be done to solve the problem.
2) Responsiblity – When you take responsibility, you live in truth. You do not become a victim of others. You begin to control and create your feelings. You stop blaming others for what has happened to you and you become proactive controlling thoughts, feelings, and stresses. By accepting responsibility as way of managing stress, you begin self-control.
3) Stop worrying – worrying is extremely dangerous for your health. By worrying you increase the chances of having a heart-attack and you become miserable which damages your relationships. Worrying is about anticipating what’s to come and doing nothing about it. If you did do something in anticipation of the future, you would then be planning and not worrying. You try to think what will happen in the near future, but nothing more then unnecessary thoughts occur. “What if…” “What will happen…” . STOP LIVING IN THE FUTURE and think about what you can fully control now. That is, think about today!
4) Self-control – You are in complete control of your emotions. Its learning to manage your mind that you correctly manage your stress. This is where your self discipline kicks in. Other people do not have access to your mind unless you give them the authorisation. You have complete control of your emotions and actions. However, you’re ability to be in control of your emotions and actions is dependent on your desire, discipline, and skill set.
5) Self understanding – You need to manage yourself and control your emotions. You need to be aware if you are treating a person in an appropriate way because of the stress. You need to know that you are stressed, why you are stressed, and ways to manage the stress.
6) Don’t stay still – When feeling down, it is easy to throw in the towel and give up. Winston Churchill said “If you are going through hell, keep going.” Don’t stop and give up. I encourage you to stop, relax, and be smart, but do not lose the perserverance to keep going. If you are going through a bad patch in life, by stopping there you remain in the bad patch.
7) Get away – You may just need to go away for a bit to refresh your mind. If you can afford a holiday, go for it! For those who can’t do that, go for a walk or work-out. By being active you release hormones that counteract stress. Also, by being away from the stress it clears your mind by taking it away from the problem.
Stress is not meant to make us miserable. We are given the ability to produce stress to complete tasks otherwise we would be sitting on our lazy backsides. Learn these ways to manage your stress, and you’ll have stress working for you and not you for it.